Life's hard

Figuring out self-care doesn't have to be.

The good news: we're in it together.

After receiving my master's degree in clinical mental health counseling, I was thrilled to be on the other side of a professional relationship that had already shifted my life in countless ways. After a few moves and a few different positions as a therapist working with children, teens, and adults, I decided to start this little corner of the interwebs, tend + mend. 

In late 2018, I created tend + mend as a place for us to tend to our inner-selves and mend the places that need healing and growth.

Combining my years of experience as a therapist with all kinds of people and what I've learned along the way in my own personal journey, I'll help you deepen your understanding and connection with yourself through resources that are well-researched and accessible.

Together, we'll help you craft a meaningful life that actually works for you.

When I'm not thinking too-serious thoughts, I'm usually talking a walk outside with my partner (he keeps me grounded!), soaking up sunshine, reading books (yet rarely finishing them!), and making way too many lists and never looking at them again.


Hey! I'm Kylie.

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I never imagined that I’d be this honest on the internet. 

Just a few months ago, you could find me playing lots of Jenga and puppets with kiddos as a children’s therapist. I loooved it. Well, kind of...

The longer(er) version

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The reality was that my ongoing struggles with my health + wellness were still very present (albeit better than in the past). Almost every day after work, I’d be wiped out in bed, with nothing left to give for myself or anyone else. Deep down, even though I adored the kids, I knew it wasn’t sustainable. 










01.

more of my story

Truth is, I became a therapist because I could listen to people's stories allllll day. Plus, the work I've done in my own personal counseling has been a total game-changer in my own life.  If I can be part of that for someone else, count me IN.

And then one day everything changed...

02.

It was as if the universe told me––nope, this really isn’t sustainable. I was fired. Yep, you read that right. F.I.R.E.D. It ended up being a misunderstanding and my employer admitted their mistake, but it was clear to me it was time to move on. So what did my unemployed, in-lots-of-student-debt, life-flipped-upside-down self decide to do? Start a blog/website/instagram from scratch with no technical skill?! Seems reasonable? 

03.

But really, I knew I needed an outlet with all my newfound free time. Merging my love for mental health, self-care, growth, connection… it was a no-brainer. 

And honestly? I’m not sure I would have taken that leap had this not all unfolded the way it did. So while part of me wishes none of it happened, I’m mostly grateful for the fresh start, the wide-open sense of possibilities, and the push off a ledge I didn’t even realize I’d gotten a wee bit too comfortable on. Funny how life works like that sometimes, huh?

04.

I guess I should have seen it coming: I’ve been writing and blogging on and off since I was in middle school (remember xanga? hacking html on myspace? blogspot?). I read a non-fiction sociology book about social dynamics of adolescent girls when I was still one myself (nerd). I research topics like embodied emotion regulation and neuroplasticity in my spare time, and I can’t help but try to gather people together for meaningful conversations. 


05.

But you wanna know what it comes down to for me? Helping people know they aren’t the only ones. That what they feel doesn’t make them flawed or broken, but usually actually makes a lot of sense once we get to the heart of it. 

Because life is ruthless. 
Especially if you’re brave enough to open yourself up to truly taken in every single ounce of it. 

06.

So if I can be another whisper to you along the way, reminding you “you’re worth it” when you’ve got a million reasons to hide, shut down, or give up, then I’ll be more than honored. 

But I also love me a good episode of the bachelorette. I contain multitudes. 💁🏻

07.

Cold weather and snow; give me the sun any day
Rules or norms that don't make sense
Itchy sweaters or itchy anything for that matter
Dishonesty

Warm showers, warm blankets, and warm coffee
A hot bath after a long day
Early evening walks around the neighborhood
Trying to keep my plants alive

I'm Into...

I'm Not So Into...

the little things

as seen on 

She is doing such important, meaningful work, and I truly appreciate it.

I listened to the self care workshop as I got ready for work and school this morning. Today I found myself asking what I needed, and checking in with myself much more than usual. I think her workshop and words of wisdom will stay with me and keep me more mindful of self care practices (and the things that usually keep me from self care).

Michelle Sargenti

Although I'm much older than her, she shares a wisdom that speaks to me at this time in my life.

Bonnie

I believe she cares about people, comes across as down to earth & relatable.

anonymous review from workshop survey

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